About Sparky

Author Archive | Sparky

Episode 221 – Tyesha and Hobbit, Part 2 Rebroadcast

This is a rebroadcast of Episode 29

After the great episode we had with Tyesha and Hobbit (see Part 1) we just had to continue on with the conversation in a part 2 episode. This one we decided to take up some topics regarding gender and gender identity.

The energy of this episode was amazing for both of us, having both a fun discussion but also really getting into some interesting discussions. We are very happy to have both of these awesome guests on the show!

Show Notes

Discussion Topics

  • Best in Show event recap
  • Discussions about Gender Identity
  • Gender Pronouns – She, He, Ze
  • “Tranny Bonus Hole”
  • Why is it ok to be irreverent and offensive

About Our Guests

Tyesha and Hobbit are two lovely ladies that lead open sexual lives. Hobbit is active in the Seattle Women of Leather and married a gay leather man (for the benefits). Tyesha is originally from Texas and writes for Leatherati. Find Tyesha on Twitter and Facebook.

 

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 220 – Tyesha and Hobbit, Part 1 rebroadcast

This episode is a rebroadcast of Episode 28

We met up with Tyesha and Hobbit during the rehearsals of the recent Best in Show event put on by SEA-PAH. We had such a great time getting to know them that night that we had decided that they needed to be on the show! This was a wild time, where we cover a bit about who Hobbit and Tyesha are, and where they came from. We also chat about queer issues, titles, hoo-has, alpacas, and a variety of play.

We also spend some time talking about Mama Sandy Reinhardt, and the renowned Mama’s Family. You can find out more about her at mamasfamily.org. Hopefully we can get her on the show soon!

You are just going to have to hear this one to believe it!

Show Notes

In the News

About Our Guests

Tyesha and Hobbit are two lovely ladies that lead open sexual lives. Hobbit is active in the Seattle Women of Leather and married a gay leather man (for the benefits). Tyesha is originally from Texas and writes for Leatherati. Find Tyesha on Twitter and Facebook.

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 219 – Spreading (the word about) STDs REBROADCAST

This episode is a rebroadcast of Episode 21.

 

Also, Daddy Tony has spent many years as a volunteer and as a professional peer educator in the San Francisco community. He comes armed with years of experience talking about STDs and HIV from all kinds of backgrounds, including gay and kinky communities, so having his voice as a part of the show is critical perfect and I know he was very happy to be able to provide this information.

We made reference to some resources that are out there, which we will post up later this week in a new post. And be sure to check the show notes section for a reference to a TEDx talk about a possible public health message regarding reducing the spread of STDs sent in by Fossil9 (Thanks much Fossil!).

Show Notes

In the News

Listener Letter

A listener sent in the following mail that prompted us to start preparing for this show. The mail was:

I love the show and have been looking for this kind of show for a long time, and look forward to every episode. Can you do a myth of STD’s or a STD tip that would be great. I am a social worker and would love to recommend your podcast to my “let’s talk sex” Group.

Discussion Topics

  • Resources
  • There is more than HIV
  • Prevention Tips
  • HIV
  • PREP
  • Window of exposure
  • “Clean”?
  • TEDx: Rule of Three Discussion

About Our Guest

Karen Dykes is a nurse practitioner that specializes in infectious diseases, STD’s, and HIV. She lives in Seattle.

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 218 – You, Dear Listener

Description of Show

The guys will delve into the listener correspondence pile and give thoughtful, reasonable responses. :)

 Show Notes

  • What Now?
    • It has been one year since the attack on the Pulse club in Orlando.
  • In the News and Letters!

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Ribbed Silicone Anal Trainer Kit for $57.95.

 

titusplugl-1-web

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 217 – Pawlish

Description of Show

The guys turn to the more sobering subject of safety – both personal safety and online safety.

 Show Notes

  • In the News
  • Our guest, Pawlish, is the 2017 International Mister Boot Black. He talks about his experience as an Asian man in the leather community.
  • What about race fetishization? It seems the “vanilla” (non-kink) community may be more guilty of that than kinksters.
  • It seems left versus right politics is unfortunately alive and well…within IML.
  • Find Pawlish on Facebook at #IMBB2017

 

About our Guest

Pawlish is passionate about learning and mentorship—fostered by his years at a particularly “fruity” company. After 18 moves across 3 continents, what he’s learned is to stay hungry, and IT for an SF startup fits that bill… for now. That hunger also persists when it comes to Leather & kink, where he loves discussing social impact and
challenging others’ perspectives. He’s found resonance with puppy play, bootblacking, and Sir/Daddy roles. You can find him wagging away while putting a shine to a boot, snacking on whatever he’s recently baked. Pawlish lives in Cincinnati with his husband, Bamm-Bamm.

 

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Unlined Leather Hood for $239.95.

ht001-15

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Ungagged Episode 23 – Before You Get Dirty…

Description of Show

You have to get it clean before you get dirty. The pups spend this show talking about care of your gear, no matter if it is fabric, leather, rubber, or your skin.

Show Notes

  • In the News
  • Cleaning Your Fabrics
    • Sheets can be an issue during intense anal play…so look to buying white towels in bulk.
    • Know your solvents.
      • Water of course is a classic, but water and salt is good for many fabric stains.
      • Diluted vinegar or lemon juice is also a great, but gentle solvent.
      • You can move up to diluted hydrogen peroxide or even bleach for the toughest stains.
    • Clean a stain from the other direction. Go behind the stain to get the staining agent out quickly.
  • Cleaning Your Leather
    • Stains can either be on the sealed top-layer, or could go into the hide underneath.
    • Top-layer stains in leather can be removed with saddle soap. Get it wet and use a very soft bristle brush to get the stain out, then use a sponge.
    • Sometimes leather can get over-conditioned, where the dye of the leather comes off on your clothes or skin. Using pure alcohol can help to strip off some of the excess oil-based conditioner.
    • Alternatively, you can buy a leather deglazer to strip off extra conditioner as well. You can then re-condition after stripping with saddle soap.
    • Sometimes you lose color in leather gear. Mr-S recommends Lincoln Quality dyes.
    • Bootblacks at leather events are wonderful resources for expert advice on your leather gear.
    • Acrylic or wax sealants can also be great to protect leather in wet situations.
  • Cleaning Your Rubber
    • Simple is best. Go to water, or water with a drop of dishwashing detergent.
  • Cleaning Your Skin
    • How about your butt? Lubes in your butt can be hard to clean. Wipe it off from the edge of your hole outward.
    • Use a saline solution in a spray bottle for mild cleaning of your junk.
    • For super-messy lubes on the hands, powdered soap (like Borax) can be applied to instantly remove lube.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature Saddle Soap.

b105_a_2

 

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 216 – Safety Dance

Description of Show

The guys turn to the more sobering subject of safety – both personal safety and online safety.

 Show Notes

  • What Now? It is still Trump. Keep up the pressure, and be patient.
  • In the News
  • Safety. Even in the “liberal” neighborhoods, violence does happen.
  • Do the common-sense things for personal safety: Walk in well-lit areas, walk with other friends, and be simply aware of your surroundings (and put up your cell phone) as you walk.
  • Also if you are on-foot and being followed by a car: change to the opposite direction immediately. That will buy you some time to get out of the situation.
  • Flight, not fight: Always choose running away. Only resort to fighting if there is no escape from it.
  • Be the loudest fighter: Scream…shout…attract attention as much as possible.
  • Be an efficient fighter: Go for a kick to the kneecaps first. Hard to defend against and can be an effective attack to affect their mobility, which gives you a better chance to get away.
  • Other high-percentage areas to attack: the eyes, ears, and nose.
  • A good chest area to aim for is where the rib cage meets the sternum/breastbone. Hitting that area will likely knock the wind out of them.
  • What about guns for personal protection? Research shows that guns are only effective against attacks where you see them over 20 feet away. Also, if they are more than 20 feet away, you are safer running away versus shooting.
  • Another effective attack is to grab them by the collar, push back and pull them toward you as hard as you can. Can be very disorientating, and would give you more time to run away.
  • Use the weapons you have: your keys, a whistle, even a small metal baton.
  • Learn self-defense: Aikito, Karate, Krav Maga, and even boxing and mixed-martial arts.
  • Practice online safety: Keep your kink life separate by having different Facebook profiles for your private and public lives.
  • You do not publish your address or phone number for anyone to look at.
  • Also tend to communicate with well-established profiles with lots of online friends, even common friends.
  • Do not reveal your workplace and/or its location to anyone. Describe your job in generic terms.
  • Having face pics is an effort to show trust to others that they talk to. A person not having face pics and refuses to share them should be a big, red flag.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Show Tail Black, just $49.95:

Square-Peg-Show-Tail-Plugless-Puppy-Tail-D475L--10

 

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 213 – Savage on Consent

Description of Show

Dan Savage returns to the podcast as a guest, and we talk about consent.

 Show Notes

  • What Now? Dan presents it this week, and mentions three organizations that really could use our donations: ACLU, Planned Parenthood, and the International Refugee Assistance Project.
  • In the News: Sadly, stealthing is the newest, dangerous sex trend…for straight people.
  • We receive a letter asking for advice from Dan about a violation of consent from a prominent member of their local kink community.
  • The discussion moves into consent in general.
    • Having “the talk” before going in. A too-long talk can make the scene less passionate.
    • How you give “the talk.” It can be given in a reassuring, positive, and inclusive way.
    • Practice makes perfect…with the same person. You will read each other more readily without having to vocalize things, and trust between the two grows with each new experience with each other.
    • Consent given during a sexual experience that was previously out-of-bounds…not to be taken lightly.
    • Straight folks new to kink may be at a slight disadvantage compared to the gay male community…since gay men tend to first ask “what are you into?” since there is not one activity assumed to be part of gay sex.
    • Sometimes, consent given even well-before a scene could still be a negative time, but the consolation prize is that the person who gave the consent learned what they did not like.
    • Finally, if you are on the extreme side of kink activities, maybe an e-mail or text exchange stating what is consented to is a good idea.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Padded Scream Mitts:

scream-mitts-sl256-306

 

About Our Guest

Dan Savage is a sex advice columnist, activist, author, and podcaster from Seattle. Listen to his podcast The Savage Lovecast and read his writing on The Stranger at The Savage Love and SLOG.

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 212 – Hot Daddy On Daddy Action

Description of Show

We speak to Daddy James, a trans-man who talks about how his kink and his gender identity intersect.

 Show Notes

  • What Now? Maybe we should consider a bomb shelter?
  • In the News: Chechnya and the establishment of gay concentration camps. Here is how you can help stop the practice and work is proceeding on helping gay men evacuate Chechnya.
  • Our guest, Daddy James, talks about his life as a trans-man, and the different transitions he has made.
  • James talks about how being a boy for a Sir helped him to reinforce his gender identity.
  • Youth and the daddy role – With Daddy James being 25, he tells us how he deals with a certain ageist attitude.
  • Daddy James provides some advice to younger daddies on how to project your inner-daddy without having to be an overly aggressive douchebag.
  • Daddy James talks about his time as a puppy and how he has mentored others in the puppy community and how dominance can still be shown within a puppy/dog headspace.

 

Guest

In the fall of 2014, Daddy James began his life in Leather as a service boy to SIR Quinn as a member of the Skullfucker Leather family. In this role, he learned about Leather traditions and was mentored in the role and responsibilities of being a Dominant. Seeking a way to express himself and his identity further, he also became active in the Seattle pup community as a highly energetic Jack Russell Terrier named Chance. In the winter of 2015, he earned his Leather-pup hood as a right of passage from boy/puppy to Daddy/Handler.

Daddy James is the owner and crafter at Howling Pup Leather. He is also an out and proud transgender man who advocates for kink spaces to be trans positive, as part of their greater commitment to body and sex positivity.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Neoprene Football Short. Available for $169.95.

neoprene-football-shorts-neo149k-18

 

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Ungagged Episode 22 – The Best Played Plans

Description of Show

The best play scenes involve planning, but too much can ruin spontaneity. In this episode of Ungagged, the puppies talk about how that balance can be achieved without thinking you are in a business meeting while you play.

Show Notes

  • In the News
  • Making Play Scenes Hot but Not Scripted
    • Even if it seems overkill, making a full itinerary can still be very helpful, especially for newer subs.
    • Scenes involving VR can be especially fun, but it really involves a lot of planning and setup since you really do not want to fiddle with it during the scene.
    • Having a good electro-stim scene also involves a lot of planning….namely seeing what the limits are for each participant beforehand to avoid boredom or too much pain.
    • Each participant also should plan ahead for what their bodies will be doing during the scene.
      • If you will be bottoming, then you want to be sure you are clean down there.
      • If you will be in a particular position for any length of time, then you should be sure that your body and your muscles are fit enough to stay in that position.
    • The Golden Rule does not always apply: The dom may want to put their assumptions away on what will feel good to the sub and ask a lot of questions to the sub on what feels good and what does not.
    • The Boy Scout Rule: Be prepared! Everything will not work during a scene, so have some alternatives prepared to substitute in just in case something breaks or something is not feeling good to a participant.
    • Home Field Advantage: Planning and executing a scene goes a lot easier when you are familiar with the space you are playing in. The dom in a scene playing at home will be better prepared for the unexpected since they know where everything is.
    • If you are planning a scene in a place that is not the home of a participant, then pack well! Have everything you need in your “bag of tricks” and know where everything is in your bag for quick access.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Leather Head Cushion.

ss52-09

 

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 211 – Daydream Believer

Description of Show

Our fantasies…ourselves. This week we talk about fantasies and the different ways they manifest themselves…both in the real world and in our minds.

 Show Notes

  • What Now? Voting. Be registered. Don’t wait until right before an election. Register now at vote.org.
  • In the News: When BDSM and a popular, open-source software application collide: Quiet Kinkster Kicked Out of Drupal.
  • Fantasies. Daddy Tony is asked about his, and if they are actively integrated in his life.
  • Sparky relates how his fantasy boundaries work, which are mainly ones that are in the realm of the possible or achievable.
  • Limits to fantasy actualization:
    • Political correctness involving race or age
    • Dropping out of careers for 24/7/365 fantasy
    • Those that cause life-altering physical harm to themselves or others
  • Sparky talks about how his fantasies are more situational and are based on real people he sees from day-to-day.
  • Dark fantasies. Physical harm or violence. Some fantasy actualization could actually cause emotional harm to themselves over concern and seeing the real reactions of the other participants.
  • Hey listeners, we want to hear about your fantasies. Are they possible? Have you ever regretted making a fantasy come true? Tell us about it at info@nosafeword.com.

 

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Deluxe Leather Straitjacket.deluxe-leather-straitjacket-dolan-wolf-sj009-18

 

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 210 – Ghostly Reject

Description of Show

When we are out there in the world of kink we run into people that are not going to be into us. Or people who are into us that we are not into. And then we have a choice.

Do we ignore them? Do they ignore us? Do we just ghost away and pretend it never happened?

Or are we honest with them and say we just aren’t into them? Do we want someone to be honest with us when they are not into us?

Of course there is no one answer and it really depends on the situation, but it happens so much we need to talk about it! Come take a listen.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Wireless Vibrating Dildo Suction Cup: Available in 7″ base for $81.95 and 8″ base for $87.95.

Wireless-Virbrator-7inch-D3507-303

 

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 209 – All The News

Description of Show

Today we dedicate the show to a wide variety of news articles and listener feedback!

Show Notes

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Wireless Vibrating Dildo Suction Cup: Available in 7″ base for $81.95 and 8″ base for $87.95.

Wireless-Virbrator-7inch-D3507-303

 

About Our Guest

Read full story · Comments { 0 }

Episode 208 – Rude Screwed and Tattooed

Description of Show

Our guest on the show is Sister Domine Trix, AKA Russ, of the Abbey of St. Joan (Seattle chapter) of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.

Show Notes

  • What now? We live in stressful times, so be sure to get away from the news headlines and go for a walk, relax, get a blow job! Keep informed, but don’t get too obsessed with it all.
  • In the News: Gasp! Gaydar isn’t real, according to science.
  • Russ and Daddy Tony talk about the Sisters and the crossover between Sisterhood and kink. Some arrived in kink via Sisterhood and vice versa.
  • Russ is quite the tatted-out Sister…with over 250 hours of ink work on his body. He discusses how tattoos have helped him to embrace his own body image of parts of his body that initially he was not as proud of.
  • How do we choose what tattoos go on our body…and what are our personal boundaries on what should not go on our bodies?
  • Speaking of personal boundaries…Russ asks why many people who see others with tattoos often will lift up the tattoo owners’ clothing (without asking!) when they see parts of tattoos obscured by clothing.
  • Tattoos in unusual or very visible locations (face, hands) and is it always wise to have those when you are very young?
  • Those who “look/seem like they would not have tattoos” who do. Breaking stereotypes is healthy…and can be very erotic!
  • Russ is also is a belly dancer instructor…actually one of the first certified male belly dance instructors.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Prestige ElectraLoops

Prestige-Electra-Loops-EM3156-300

About our Guest

Russ is many things. He is a Sister of Perpetual Indulgence, a Tribal Belly Dancer/Teacher, a burlesque dancer, an Emcee, and a Project Manager in the Power Industry. He keeps himself busy by lifting heavy things and putting them back down and also by getting tattooed.

Read full story · Comments { 0 }
Page 2 of 1412345...10...Last »