Tag Archives | Kink

Episode 226 – Mentors, the fresh maker

Description of Show

The guys spend the show discussing mentorship: being one and how to find one.

 Show Notes

  • What Now? 
  • In the News
  • Mentorship can be an explicit or an implicit relationship
    • There is always the explicit Sir/boy type of relationship
    • On the other hand, some mentors do not even realize they are mentors
  • Has mentorship, over time, gone down because of the Internet?
  • Mentorship does not have to be just “showing someone the ropes.” Mentors can also impart more advanced knowledge to those who are not beginners.
  • Being a mentor is not about acting like a superior person. Authenticity is extremely important, not putting on airs.
  • Seeking a mentor:
    • Carefully consider who your mentors will be.
    • As said before, it does not have to be an explicitly-stated thing. Just being around that person is sufficient. In other words, no awkward, formal request to a potential mentor is necessary.
  • What do you look for in a mentor? Send us a message at info@nosafeword.com and let us talk about it.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Jock Holster Bone, just $89.95:

jock-holster-bone-pup-puppy-play-h152-306

 

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Episode 225 – We are back!

Description of Show

We are back! To avoid pulling something (ahem) we are going to hear from our listeners and provide feedback.

 Show Notes

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Locking Waist Belt, just $139.95:

mr-s-locking-waist-belt

 

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Ungagged Episode 24 – The More the Merrier

Description of Show

The pups spend this show discussing group sex, group dynamics, and how to make your group experiences the best they can.

Show Notes

  • In the News
  • Group Sex
    • The pups start out small and talk about threesomes.
      • Are two-as-a-team strictly pleasuring the other the best way to have a threesome?
      • A common reason against any group sex: too much going on and too much concentration needed.
    • Play parties
      • The mood of each party can be very different…so keep your expectations reasonable.
      • With lots of other scenes going on around you, it can be a problem if you are easily distracted by sound.
      • There is always going to be a better chance of drama when more people are involved, so be ready and be calm.
      • If it is a party of 8 or more people, then be sure the party has a separate, more social space.
      • Reasonable expectations, but have some expectations and have a plan of how to make that happen.
      • How do you deal with the guy who won’t take no for an answer? Be direct. Try to be polite, but say it in no uncertain terms..

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature Saddle Soap.

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Episode 218 – You, Dear Listener

Description of Show

The guys will delve into the listener correspondence pile and give thoughtful, reasonable responses. :)

 Show Notes

  • What Now?
    • It has been one year since the attack on the Pulse club in Orlando.
  • In the News and Letters!

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Ribbed Silicone Anal Trainer Kit for $57.95.

 

titusplugl-1-web

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Episode 215 – Foot in Mouth, Please

Description of Show

Today, at popular request, we talk about feet! Despite Sparky’s personal aversion, we brought on a veritable foot fetish expert, author James T. Medak, to talk to us about all things feet. This is also perhaps our most pun-filled episode to date!

Show Notes

  • In the News
  • Podophilia – Foot Worship!
    • Our guest was suggested by fan of the show, TiedFeetGuy.
    • Introverts and folks from repressive environments tend to more often into feet
    • Foot sucking and service can be an intense power play and show of total submission
    • Tickle torture is a common way tops can enjoy feet paired with bondage
    • Foot fetishism can be an obsession, a primal lust and need for worship. Foot pigs will pay for used smelly socks for example.
    • Foot fucking and foot jobs can be an intense sensation for both
    • It’s hard to introduce your foot fetish to a potential partner. Many get very self conscious about the social stigma.

About Our Guest

James T. Medak is the author of five best-selling erotic tomes, including Getting Off on the Wrong Foot, How to be a Foot Pig, and an anthology called The Best Foot Forward. When not working on his sixth novel, he maintains a popular Tumblr and continues to get into all sorts of kinky things with his boyfriend. He lives in Chicago.

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Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Triple Stripe Rubber Sox:

Rubber Socks

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Episode 214 – Cock Holster

Description of Show

In the age of Trump, it’s a great time to re-examine the idea of political correctness in the scope of all the crazy news lately.

 Show Notes

  • What Now? Stephen Colbert, long time champion of gay rights, is raked over the coals for a crude joke. Is “PC culture” starting to chase its own tail? Also: Conservatives erupt in faux outrage over gay rights to try to weaken their progressive opponent. Here’s Colbert’s joke in context. #notfirecolbert
  • In the News
    • According to a “study,” just thinking about sex makes you want to have it more! Amazing!
    • Man will serve at least 30 years in prison after beating to death a man who responded to an online ad for sex.
    • What leads people to kink? Are we born with our twisted desires? Thought for the nerds: Are kinksters a Protected Class under the Civil Rights Act of 1964? Lets check back in 10 years.
    • Dolphins have kinky sex. And scientists are paid to watch. Hawt!
    • The drunker a straight guy is, the more likely he’ll find a guy hot.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Thick-Walled Cock Cylinder:

TT100_2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Episode 213 – Savage on Consent

Description of Show

Dan Savage returns to the podcast as a guest, and we talk about consent.

 Show Notes

  • What Now? Dan presents it this week, and mentions three organizations that really could use our donations: ACLU, Planned Parenthood, and the International Refugee Assistance Project.
  • In the News: Sadly, stealthing is the newest, dangerous sex trend…for straight people.
  • We receive a letter asking for advice from Dan about a violation of consent from a prominent member of their local kink community.
  • The discussion moves into consent in general.
    • Having “the talk” before going in. A too-long talk can make the scene less passionate.
    • How you give “the talk.” It can be given in a reassuring, positive, and inclusive way.
    • Practice makes perfect…with the same person. You will read each other more readily without having to vocalize things, and trust between the two grows with each new experience with each other.
    • Consent given during a sexual experience that was previously out-of-bounds…not to be taken lightly.
    • Straight folks new to kink may be at a slight disadvantage compared to the gay male community…since gay men tend to first ask “what are you into?” since there is not one activity assumed to be part of gay sex.
    • Sometimes, consent given even well-before a scene could still be a negative time, but the consolation prize is that the person who gave the consent learned what they did not like.
    • Finally, if you are on the extreme side of kink activities, maybe an e-mail or text exchange stating what is consented to is a good idea.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Padded Scream Mitts:

scream-mitts-sl256-306

 

About Our Guest

Dan Savage is a sex advice columnist, activist, author, and podcaster from Seattle. Listen to his podcast The Savage Lovecast and read his writing on The Stranger at The Savage Love and SLOG.

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Ungagged Episode 22 – The Best Played Plans

Description of Show

The best play scenes involve planning, but too much can ruin spontaneity. In this episode of Ungagged, the puppies talk about how that balance can be achieved without thinking you are in a business meeting while you play.

Show Notes

  • In the News
  • Making Play Scenes Hot but Not Scripted
    • Even if it seems overkill, making a full itinerary can still be very helpful, especially for newer subs.
    • Scenes involving VR can be especially fun, but it really involves a lot of planning and setup since you really do not want to fiddle with it during the scene.
    • Having a good electro-stim scene also involves a lot of planning….namely seeing what the limits are for each participant beforehand to avoid boredom or too much pain.
    • Each participant also should plan ahead for what their bodies will be doing during the scene.
      • If you will be bottoming, then you want to be sure you are clean down there.
      • If you will be in a particular position for any length of time, then you should be sure that your body and your muscles are fit enough to stay in that position.
    • The Golden Rule does not always apply: The dom may want to put their assumptions away on what will feel good to the sub and ask a lot of questions to the sub on what feels good and what does not.
    • The Boy Scout Rule: Be prepared! Everything will not work during a scene, so have some alternatives prepared to substitute in just in case something breaks or something is not feeling good to a participant.
    • Home Field Advantage: Planning and executing a scene goes a lot easier when you are familiar with the space you are playing in. The dom in a scene playing at home will be better prepared for the unexpected since they know where everything is.
    • If you are planning a scene in a place that is not the home of a participant, then pack well! Have everything you need in your “bag of tricks” and know where everything is in your bag for quick access.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Leather Head Cushion.

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Episode 211 – Daydream Believer

Description of Show

Our fantasies…ourselves. This week we talk about fantasies and the different ways they manifest themselves…both in the real world and in our minds.

 Show Notes

  • What Now? Voting. Be registered. Don’t wait until right before an election. Register now at vote.org.
  • In the News: When BDSM and a popular, open-source software application collide: Quiet Kinkster Kicked Out of Drupal.
  • Fantasies. Daddy Tony is asked about his, and if they are actively integrated in his life.
  • Sparky relates how his fantasy boundaries work, which are mainly ones that are in the realm of the possible or achievable.
  • Limits to fantasy actualization:
    • Political correctness involving race or age
    • Dropping out of careers for 24/7/365 fantasy
    • Those that cause life-altering physical harm to themselves or others
  • Sparky talks about how his fantasies are more situational and are based on real people he sees from day-to-day.
  • Dark fantasies. Physical harm or violence. Some fantasy actualization could actually cause emotional harm to themselves over concern and seeing the real reactions of the other participants.
  • Hey listeners, we want to hear about your fantasies. Are they possible? Have you ever regretted making a fantasy come true? Tell us about it at info@nosafeword.com.

 

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Deluxe Leather Straitjacket.deluxe-leather-straitjacket-dolan-wolf-sj009-18

 

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Episode 210 – Ghostly Reject

Description of Show

When we are out there in the world of kink we run into people that are not going to be into us. Or people who are into us that we are not into. And then we have a choice.

Do we ignore them? Do they ignore us? Do we just ghost away and pretend it never happened?

Or are we honest with them and say we just aren’t into them? Do we want someone to be honest with us when they are not into us?

Of course there is no one answer and it really depends on the situation, but it happens so much we need to talk about it! Come take a listen.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Wireless Vibrating Dildo Suction Cup: Available in 7″ base for $81.95 and 8″ base for $87.95.

Wireless-Virbrator-7inch-D3507-303

 

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Episode 209 – All The News

Description of Show

Today we dedicate the show to a wide variety of news articles and listener feedback!

Show Notes

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Wireless Vibrating Dildo Suction Cup: Available in 7″ base for $81.95 and 8″ base for $87.95.

Wireless-Virbrator-7inch-D3507-303

 

About Our Guest

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Episode 208 – Rude Screwed and Tattooed

Description of Show

Our guest on the show is Sister Domine Trix, AKA Russ, of the Abbey of St. Joan (Seattle chapter) of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.

Show Notes

  • What now? We live in stressful times, so be sure to get away from the news headlines and go for a walk, relax, get a blow job! Keep informed, but don’t get too obsessed with it all.
  • In the News: Gasp! Gaydar isn’t real, according to science.
  • Russ and Daddy Tony talk about the Sisters and the crossover between Sisterhood and kink. Some arrived in kink via Sisterhood and vice versa.
  • Russ is quite the tatted-out Sister…with over 250 hours of ink work on his body. He discusses how tattoos have helped him to embrace his own body image of parts of his body that initially he was not as proud of.
  • How do we choose what tattoos go on our body…and what are our personal boundaries on what should not go on our bodies?
  • Speaking of personal boundaries…Russ asks why many people who see others with tattoos often will lift up the tattoo owners’ clothing (without asking!) when they see parts of tattoos obscured by clothing.
  • Tattoos in unusual or very visible locations (face, hands) and is it always wise to have those when you are very young?
  • Those who “look/seem like they would not have tattoos” who do. Breaking stereotypes is healthy…and can be very erotic!
  • Russ is also is a belly dancer instructor…actually one of the first certified male belly dance instructors.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Prestige ElectraLoops

Prestige-Electra-Loops-EM3156-300

About our Guest

Russ is many things. He is a Sister of Perpetual Indulgence, a Tribal Belly Dancer/Teacher, a burlesque dancer, an Emcee, and a Project Manager in the Power Industry. He keeps himself busy by lifting heavy things and putting them back down and also by getting tattooed.

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Episode 207 – Lawd Have MIR-cy

Description of Show

Our guest on the show is Preston ‘Wexx’ So, Mr. International Rubber 2017.

Show Notes

  • In the News: A politician running for Arizona governor is actually honest…about his sex life.
  • Preston vs Bill O’Reilly:
  • MIR – Preston talks about the night he assumed his title…and a few of the more interesting parts of the contest…and it involved penetration.
  • First Asian international title-holder. Preston talks about race and kink and their interactions.
  • Unfortunately, Trump’s election reverberations even affect major kink events. Preston tells us about a fellow attendee of a major leather event who had pushed him out of an elevator and invoked Trump’s election for the reason why.
  • Preston speaks of those who are in the Asian community and their views of kink. In comparison, he talks about Margaret Cho and how even she is looked upon negatively in the Korean community due to her open sexuality.
  • Boston Pride and Preston: Preston gets to share his kink, while he is openly gay, with his co-workers.
  • Race itself being fetishized. Preston talks about his experiences of that happening…and how it seems to be a uniquely American thing.
  • Rubberize the World! Preston wants to expose the world to rubber and share the love of rubber with countries around the world…and to promote enthusiasts everywhere to be open about their love of rubber.

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Stainless Steel Nut Tugger

StainlessSteel

About our Guest

*Preston “wexx” So* is Mr. International Rubber 20 (2017) and Mr. New
England Rubber 2016. The first international fetish titleholder of Asian
heritage, he is honored to bring the MIR title back to New England and
the New England Rubber Men. Previously, Preston was the resident
materials expert at Harvard College Munch, the BDSM student organization
at his alma mater, where he educated other members about leather,
rubber, spandex, and similar fetishes at a time when the group was
vilified by Bill O’Reilly on Fox News as a university-funded “sex club.”

Proud to practice his passion by wearing latex out regularly, Preston
enjoys mentoring new rubberists regardless of their gender or sexuality,
especially through latex fetishism workshops at DV8/Purple Passion and
Cleveland Leather Annual Weekend (CLAW). As an international
titleholder, he has appeared on Vice.com and Watt’s the Safeword to
promote and foster latex fetishism. Preston’s mission as Mr.
International Rubber 20 is to rubberize the world — to bring the latex
fetish to places further afield and especially to unawakened rubberists.

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Ungagged Episode 21 – You Wanna Be A Star, Don’cha?

Description of Show

Have you ever thought of doing porn, or what it might be like? We share some of our limited experiences and much more we have learned from friends and others in the community around us to help you if you have considered acting in or producing porn.

Show Notes

  • In the News
  • So, you want to be a porn star?
    • What is porn?
    • Creating porn is work and not always fun
    • Mikey had a little experience with filming for kink.com
    • Consider the kind of porn that would be the best fit for you personally, don’t do it just for fame.
    • Be ready to promote your own stuff if you want it to be noticed.
    • Care about the quality
    • Research the software you’ll need for editing
    • What will be your porn identity? Amateur vs. Professional?

Sponsor

Mr. S Leather Co.

This episode sponsored by: Mr. S Leather. For this episode we feature the Wolf Collar.

Wolf Collar

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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